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Dana

[ website | My life in passing ]
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Strange Company. [Jul. 28th, 2009|12:04 pm]



Angel is the English Mastiff and Tiffany is the Calico Cat . They were best friends and they broke my heart. 

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15 [Jul. 25th, 2009|09:21 pm]
OK, here are the rules: 15 Books Don't take too long to think about it. Fifteen books you've read that will always stick with you. First fifteen you can recall in no more than 15 minutes.


1. Dangerous Angels

2. Middlesex

3. Geek Love

4. The Pussycat and the Owl

5. Angelique

6. The Youngest Doll

7. Stone Butch Blues

8. The Farming of the Bones

9 Fuzzy Dice.

10. Restricted Access: Lesbians on Disability

11. The Bunyip of Berkeley's Creek

12. Rubyfruit Jungle

13. The Lost Girls

14. Good Omens

15. Noone Belongs Here More Than You
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Writer's Block: Life of the Party [Jul. 22nd, 2009|01:15 am]
[Tags|]

Do you know any party tricks that can impress a crowd? Or even just a little kid?

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Hands down talking like Bobby's mom is pretty much a surefire way to get people laughing.
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Where [Jul. 14th, 2009|05:28 pm]
I am really excited! I have I paid a 200 dollar down payment, I have 500 in my savings, my mother is giving me 100 for my birthday and I have 6 paychecks until I actually go in and get tattooed. I plan on having at least 1000 saved up but I feel really comfortable right now because I feel I will have more then that and enough to get really nice birthday presents for Lucas. We are seeing Harry Potter at 12:10, (The first 3 shows were sold out.)


I don't know what is going to happen but Lucas is leaving in August and I have no Idea about what I will be doing, I am incredibly sad but it will be so good for him and maybe good for me though it doesn't feel like that could ever be true.  I have no idea where I am going. I just have to do something.
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things are. [Jun. 20th, 2009|07:42 pm]
[music |BOYS BOYS BOYS]

Tonight is Battle Star Gallactica night. I work 7 days in a row and since the dude who usually works night is either in jail/evading the police/about to be in jail I work nights. Ew.

So I made a lot of progress in my room and have figured out what I need in order to make storage pretty/functional so I don't have piles of books/clothes everwhere. I decided to compromise and instead of painting my walls my favorite blue and my furniture white to compliment the walls, I will just paint my walls a light blue/green or mint green to match the hunter woodgrain furniture situation and frame flash watercolors of circus freaks (I think), at minimum a family portrait from GEEK LOVE. I just want the pantry situation with dealt with before I start the huge project of painting my room.
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The tide is high but I'm hanging on. [Jun. 11th, 2009|11:43 pm]
When you drop 1500.00 in one day and then say you are poor, you make me really frustrated. I can't imagine having no debt and complaining about having "only" 1500.00 to spend. When you flunk or drop out of every college class you've taken and then wonder what you will do with your life while not even acknowledging what a privilege it is to flunk or drop classes and not have to worry about how you will be paying for future classes you make me angry. Shit is just not fair sometimes. I hate it. I passed my classes. My college closed, and I'm fucked but you just fuck around and shit will be fine for you. So please, don't tell me about your shitty life. Because what sounds terrible to you sounds like a dream to me (except I would do it differently, like not screw around in college for one).
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My counterparts have it right. [Jun. 7th, 2009|09:14 am]
I had a nightmare that I moved to NYC to work/design for a well known respected plus size fashion house. I studied under the head and lived in an apartment in the same building. I replaced the favorite and did really well for my self and the company. Instead of her hating me openly she sabotaged my life. She became my best friend and confidant and gained my trust. She convinced me to buy the entire company (how I could do that I don't even know) and kick out my mentor and the rest of our co-workers. I did and for a little we stayed afloat but eventually we were forced to close our doors. We squatted in a tent outside the empty building and Luke dumped me and fell in with a crowd of LARPing Magic card loving RPG playing kids, oh and went gayer (as if that is possible). As in he and the "leader of the crew" who was a dude were dating. Back in the tent my "friend" had an addiction to heroin and I had to steal the money that her parents sent her to pay her dealer so he wouldn't fuck her up. We were being harrassed by local police about relocating to a shelter and so I tried to walk to my mother's house. And all I thought about when I was walking was things would have been different if I had gone to college. I found Luke and his crew in an electronics store. Luke was standing in the back next to his lover and I walked in all haggard and bedraggled. One of the folks in the tourney said "I can't believe Luke was with you for so long!?" Luke whispered to his lover and took me outside. Then there was a strange Antioch Reunion  and I was the ONLY one struggling.

Yeah. Terrible dream.


In other more exciting news: I got a 130 dollar peacoat brand new from torrid for $10, and a dress and some lingerie by Jezebel 75% off is epic win!
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Sally Field is so cute! [Jun. 2nd, 2009|06:38 pm]
In the past few months I've bought all these new tight secretary/little black dresses (on clearance) and now I can't get it out of my head that I need Kink heels to pair them with. I found these 5 inch platform mary jane heels on the internet and I need want them. BAD

I am boxing up my room and painting the walls and refinishing the furniture. I am trying to reclaim my space because when I moved back home after Antioch closed I didn't clean or invest in the space because I didn't think would stay long enough to care. Now it is a place I don't like very much and I just need it to be different. I am going to shift and re-position the furniture and get rid of all the things I stored in my room because I didn't want to get rid of them. This is a daunting task but I hope I get it started soon because I want to feel happy in my room instead of sad because I hate it.


My to do list:

Pack-up and sort clothing.
Box up Books/Miscellaneous
Burn my music library to CDs and then give my computer to my father to wipe/install new motherboard/fix/whatever.
Decide on Paint Colors
Purchase Primer, Wall & Ceiling paint. (Ceiling will just get a fresh white coat.)
Move the bed to the Den
Tape up the room
Sand Prime and Paint Furniture
Thoroughly Clean the floor and walls
Prime and Paint the room
Empty and prepare Desk, Dresser and Bookcase.
Clean up
Move back into room
Decorate
Be happy.


I want this to happen soon.

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Clueless [May. 18th, 2009|09:27 pm]
[music |Heavy Cross - The Gossip]

I am almost 20 and I feel really disconnected and out of control. Yes I have a job ,and a roof over my head, but I really want to be back in college and more importantly connected to a strong community of activists, artists and queers. I've gotten quite a few rejection letters already I am waiting on two more and then that's it, all of my options for this upcoming Fall are spent. I don't know where to go from there. Do I go back to Dutchess? Where I will be miserable but at least somewhat academically engaged, and possibly connected to a small activism network? Should I try to follow my secret dream and go to cosmetology school, do I have the patience for it? Will leaving the academic world weaken my beliefs and my ability to support them? Should I wait and work, and re-apply as a freshman to all of these colleges? The spaces open for transfers were so small this year, the smallest being 10 spaces. If I had known I was comepeting for 1 of 10 spaces I honestly would have felt better about buying some impulse bullshit.

        I have an amazing and supportive partner but there is only so much he can do, he can't make colleges accept me, he can only hug me and tell me its ok when they don't, and I am really scared about when he leaves for California and that physical support is gone and it's just me and my regrets. I barely have friends here. And that is my fault. I am abrasive, critical and just plain mean.  It's not endearing. The folks I do sometimes hang out with are great people but we barely have things in common or if we have things in common and I genuinely like them they live a distance away and that makes regular visits hard to manage. I know there is an abundance of community in NYC but I can't access it easily and regularly.
  This is me now.                        This is me 2 years ago.


I just don't have a clue.

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Bummer. [May. 12th, 2009|05:15 pm]
I just bought these shoes. They arrived today and not only do they not fit, the fucking zipper is busted. I am so pissed because they were 23 dollars and really cute!
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